6 Books for Getting Started with Spiritual Direction

Spiritual direction is an age-old practice of the Church. It has roots going back to the desert mothers and fathers in the 3rd and 4th centuries, though we can certainly find examples in Scripture, too. In its simplest form, spiritual direction happens when a wise and experienced person of faith listens with another person as they listen to God.

Resources abound related to the work and vocation of spiritual direction. Whether you are a person exploring the prospect of meeting with a director for the first time or you are discerning a call to be a spiritual director, here are 6 books we have found helpful in the journey.

Sacred Companions: The Gift of Spiritual Friendship & Direction by David Benner

The Christian life is not a solo activity. There is never simply "Me and Jesus" or "Me and the Holy Spirit" or "Me and the Divine." We gain an understanding of God's activity in our lives through relationships with one another. This is one of the gifts of Benner's work. For people from a Protestant Evangelical background, Benner offers a winsome introduction to spiritual direction as a practice that helps "attune" us to God's voice in us and around us. If you're new to the idea of spiritual direction, this is a good book to start with.

The book is structured into three parts. In the first, he explores something like a peer-to-peer relationship of mutual vulnerability. In the second, he covers what might be considered classical spiritual direction involving a trained individual and someone seeking clarity and discernment. In the final section, he discusses situations in which combining the two approaches may be appropriate.

"Spiritual direction is the facilitation of attunement to God... It is one Christian accompanying another as he or she seeks to increase attentiveness to the presence of direction of the Spirit of God."

Holy Listening: The Art of Spiritual Direction by Margaret Guenther

In every initial consultation I have with a new person for spiritual direction, I share the metaphor of midwife with them. My wife gave birth to both of our kids with the help of a midwife, and this picture came so alive to me during both of those pregnancies. The midwife could separate the weird-weird from the normal-weird. God is always at work in us, and we rarely have language for it, and it freaks us out. A director is someone who has seen the rhythms and patterns of the spiritual life and can assure us when things are on track or what things we might need to explore deeper.

This is a picture I first got from Margaret Guenther and this book. Guenther explores three particular pictures in this book, the spiritual director who welcomes the stranger, the spiritual director as a good teacher, and the spiritual director as a midwife to the soul.

"It helps to begin with silence. If nothing else, the time with the direct is thereby set aside as a time of prayer, not as a conference or a friendly chat. The length of silence may vary. In the early stages of working together, the direct may find it unsettling if the stillness goes on too long, but the quiet time can extend as trust grows."

Spiritual Direction: Wisdom for the Long Walk of Faith by Henri Nouwen

If meeting with a spiritual director sounds compelling, but you don't really know what to talk about first, this book might be a good place to start to spark conversation together.

Like much of Nouwen's work, this is easy to consume but takes time to digest. He is less talking about spiritual direction directly and more about the deeper questions that lead us to a director, things like prayer, identity, vocation, our feelings about the love of God and our closeness to God.

"I wonder whether I have sufficiently realized that during all this time God has been trying to find me, to know me, and to love me. The question is not How am I to find God? But How am I to let myself be found by God? The question is not How am I to know God? but How am I to let myself be known by God? The question is not How am I to love God? but How am I to let myself be loved by God? And finally, the question is not Who is God for me? But Who am I to God?"

Working the Angles: The Shape of Pastoral Integrity by Eugene Peterson

This is part of the series Peterson wrote about the vocation of pastors (which includes The Contemplative Pastor, Under the Unpredictable Plant, and Five Smooth Stones for Pastoral Ministry). So this is a great place to start thinking about spiritual direction if you're a pastor.

The guiding picture here is a triangle, with the three "angles," or essential ingredients, to the work of a pastor being prayer, Scripture, and spiritual direction. He encourages the pastor to be both a receiver and giver of spiritual direction. Again, if spiritual direction is new territory for you, this book can be a good place to start.

"Spiritual direction takes place when two people agree to give their full attention to what God is doing in one (or both) of their lives and seek to respond in faith. More often than not for pastors these convergent and devout attentions are brief and unplanned; at other times they are planned and structured conversations. Whether planned or unplanned, three convictions underpin these meetings: (1) God is always doing something: an active grace is shaping this life into a mature salvation; (2) responding to God is not sheer guesswork: the Christian community has acquired wisdom through the centuries that provides guidance; (3) each soul is unique: no wisdom can simply be applied without discerning the particulars of this life, this situation."

Candlelight: Illuminating the Art of Spiritual Direction by Susan Phillips

Often when I am with someone new to spiritual direction the question can arise, "What does this look like? What do we talk about?" This book is great in the way that the author presents a cast of characters (based on actual sessions and people). She shares narratives of sessions through a variety of seasons of life and presenting pain points as they can show up in spiritual direction. Sometimes it feels like reading a collection of short stories. It's a great way to get a glimpse into what spiritual direction can look like.

"As we pray at the beginning of the spiritual direction hour, the flame wavers, grabs hold and runs down the wick to the surface of the wax where it wallows briefly, engaging our hope, and then gains strength as it remounts the wick. The flame remains through our time together, reminding us of God's presence as we open our hearts and minds. The candle forms a corona of light, and we are gently held in it. It also casts shadows, bringing to mind God's holy mystery as well as those parts of ourselves that lie in shadow."

Spiritual Direction: A Practical Introduction by Sue Pickering

More than anything else here, this has the feel of a textbook or manual. This is for the aspiring practitioner. Each chapter has reflection questions and there are sample sessions throughout.

"God is already at work in all people, constantly inviting, drawing, encouraging folk to come home—not home to a building or a set of dogmatic statements, but home to the One who creates us and loves us beyond our wildest imagination. The hospitality offered is safe, simple and warm, emerging from a deep confidence in God and a healthy awareness of our own poverty. It is offered in the recognition that we are only one part of the network of people and opportunities which God might use to reach out to those on the spiritual journey."

A number of these books are a part of our School of Spiritual Direction curriculum. If you are new to the practice of spiritual direction or dipping your toes in the vocation of spiritual director, one or more of these may resonate with you and be an ally with you on your own journey deeper into God's heart.